I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
