I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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