Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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