After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
