You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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