I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize
