we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
