the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
