i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize