SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
