Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
