They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Randomize
