'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
I think I just sharted jello shots
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
