she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
