I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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