I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
