He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
