How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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