there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
