I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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