This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
