But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
