Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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