the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
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