Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
tell your sister to shave her snatch
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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