He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
