how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize