You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
