he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
