The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
organizing the empties. That sober.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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