Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Can Purell be used as lube?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Randomize
