Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
one might say we're banned from that church
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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