I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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