Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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