I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
