Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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