some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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