I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I just want nice things and good sex
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
