Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
