we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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