2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
