I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
