Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
