I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
