She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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