I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
