No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I just gargled with NyQuil
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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