apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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