he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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