And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize