M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize