no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
