He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
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