honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Church boner. Awkwardddd
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
wow bdsm is so cute
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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